2025 Reflections & Onto 2026

december 2025

2025 was a year.

2025 kicked off with a wet fart considering I spent the count down de-esclating a brawl between my mom and auntie. I had a feeling this year would be a mess given that. So yeah, it sucked even outside of personal bullshit for the fact the world is kind of a fucking shitshow in so many ways its like ridiculous to believe some things are actually happening in 2025. Like we are going so backwards bro its fucking sickening. But hey, I can say that I made it to the end of it a lot more hopeful or like, at peace, than how I entered it.

I don't want to dawdle on the heavier stuff as I spent the entire year doing so in legit belief it would not get better. I tried to go bye bye this year. But hey, now I don't feel as helpless anymore and I now feel better because I have a worldview that helps me embrace how ridiculous the world and way people work now where I'm willing to still live in it despite the bullshit, because I know it doesn't HAVE to be a certain way.

Most of these things happened toward the end of the year, but better late than never!

2025 Highlights

Here's my list of highlights from 2025:

  • I graduated university with a bachelors degree. I'm the first person in my family to get a degree, and one of the only people between both sides of my family to own one.
  • I survived socially hostile work environment during the holiday season.
  • I participated in CreativeClash and did 12 attacks!
  • I redid my website like...3 times? xD more than that I bet. I can't recall.
  • I own a car (passed down to me from sister) and I'm starting to drive!
  • I got a job that gives me benefits (WTF!).
  • I've stopped believing I must be miserable for it to mean I'm allowed to experience anything. I am no longer convinced I must always be in survival mode to be in the world.

HUGE Ws HERE! I do not feel like the person I was 4 or so months ago, which is great and sad in ways. But like, I feel better. The year broke me for the better i guess

While we're on the topic of general happenings, let me share my goals for 2026.

2026 Goals

  • Affirm my gender and identity overall
  • Continue to dismantle my internalized ableism and learned helplessness
  • Keep working on being nice to my body and self - don't make it harder.
  • Build better relationships in-system & continue to improve communication.
  • Don't rush into stuff, but don't wait around for permission.
  • Socialize and nourish relationships with people that show they do accept me. Allow them to accept me. Allow myself to be accepted and cared about.
  • Attend at least one convention (furry, anime, reptile, ect)
  • Read more books, play more games and watch more shows leisurely (I've struggled a lot with not consuming much media because of feeling overwhelmed and feeling convinced I must be productive or make something out of it)
    • Finish all the WIPs....please lol
  • Allow yourself to keep searching, ask questions, wonder and gain knowledge (journal and stuff, write essays, watch documentaries, analyze shit, ect) even if it feels corny or pretentious. [ This helps SO MUCH with tackling shame or blind acceptance of bullshit. ]

AND NOW TO THE ART!

2025 Art & Commission Reflection

My art journey through 2025 was a ride! Looking through my files goes to show when and where I crashed out and a slow build back up to some vision.

I drew a TON this year, but I didn't finish a lot (at least it doesn't feel like it). I have stacks of WIPs and ideas that I did not complete. I started off strong, crashed, then slowly built myself back up. I've been experimenting A LOT and I'm starting to discover a flow that I really enjoy.

EDIT: After organizing the files, here is the more accurate perspective: theres 674 files of what we'd consider art & being sorted for online archive (not including subfolder contents). For subfolders, 87 Entries for my Pachi-a-Day challenge, 125 .clip or .kra files that are sketches I want to revisit and finish, and then 288 site assests. I made a lot!

personal art reflection

I started Wrenpaw's Faith and got through the prologue before putting it on pause due to anxiety - this story will be returning 2026! I managed to animate a short AMV after a very long time, which was very important to me because I've struggled with such bad anxiety about animating and posting to Youtube. In general, I'm coming back out of my shell artistically.

RK/Proxy ended up being the go to sona for the longest part of the year (as I've been the best at fronting RAHHH BITCH!!), and Pachla resurfaced like a beast.

I feel more comfy taking wild approaches to my art now. However, it feels like my understanding of anatomy went out the window for a bit.

We're trying to be less restricted to digital art too!

In 2025, I did 31 general SFW, 10 general NSFW, 20 babyfur, 20 comic pages, 18 omorashi themed, and 13 scat themed commissions. Also, I ended up doing 39 telegram stickers in total.

So, overall I did 131 commissions which were either full body or illustrative (not including alts) and and 20 different comic pages. I'd say things went well and damn I did a lot!

I am grateful for every person that supported me this year. Everyone who supported my art gave me ability to keep moving forward and handle bills I would not have been able to if people weren't buying my art.

This is the first year of me reflecting on this as I want to approach selling art better going forward and improve my outlook and feelings regarding commissions and selling art.

While I did over 130 commissions, many of them were sold for discounted prices and worked on when I was like, in belief I'd fucking die if I didn't get enough money fast enough. I've struggled with my relationship for commissions for a very long time because of how I'd approach them and reasons I'd have to sell. Shit was always urgent or like crisis point. I'm looking forward to change it up so I can engage and sell better, as I do not have great selling practices or understanding despite selling over over a decade. I feel really sloppy and burnt out. I've lost ALOT of money in the process of selling due to transferring fees, taxes or for refunds.

I want to sell less but have more pieces I look back on that I feel proud of sending to someone else. I want to take a "less but better" approach if life allows me to do so. It'll let me improve my skills, tackle my personal works and connect better with others since it disconnects that transactional and indebted component. It'll also be nice to do less for the sake of my health - I have cubital tunnel and carpal tunnel syndrome, and this year was diagnosed with sacroiliac (si) joint dysfunction. To be frank, I do not want art as a career. I will NOT do art a career. I just want it to be my hobby and a side hustle - nothing more! I've been fucking up my body really bad from it, and I struggle to feel like anything I've done was good enough! I think I'm a better artist and overall person in all facets if I don't monetize and rely on my art for survival.

While I've struggled with every job I've had up till now due to overstimulation and frustration with how the world wants you to function, I can't go forth making the thing that keeps me sane in this reality be what stresses me out in the way the rest of the world does. In 2026, I'm gonna do everything in my power to adjust to the 40hr work week if it means making art and drawing OCs can just be What I want it to for me in the live I want to live.

One of the things I'm looking forward to is being able to support other artists like how people supported me! It's one of the big reasons why me working this new job means a ton - I will be able to support others and give back. It's always been something crushing my soul not being able to do, so I'm looking forward to it to help share the love and help others out instead of be the person always looking for help. I guess that's another big thing that weighed me down with commissions is like, I could never help others when they're in the same boat. I want it to be different and will aim for being one to help others.

2026 Art Goals

I'm looking forward to the new year, and I'm not planning going in with a crazy list to end up being hard on myself about it, but here's some hopes for 2026.

  • Animate an OC AMV - you have a folder full of storyboards, choose one and work on it for as long as needed. You do not need to finish an AMV in 3 days. Let it take months for fucks sake.
  • Engage with other artists more (comments, trades, buying commissions, ect). Don't be so scared of others.
  • Sell less art, but with better quality
  • Improve selling practices and approaches
  • Get atleast 20% of Wrenpaw's Faith made - you have the entire script and decided its gonna be a weird format...GO FORTH!! MAKE IT!
  • Do a lot of crafting!
  • Make a cosplay or fursuit :3
  • FINISH THE WIPS! both art and writing wips! just fukcing post them
  • ....indulge and make art and stories for ur pkmn OC stories u flap ur hands about already...!!!
  • DO THE FUCKING TOY COMICS!!!

Alongside these goals, I'm hoping to keep improving my online behaviors (less posting when distressed and stuff) and work on not being so afraid of people.

Wrapping it Up

So yeah, rough year, ending it with my head up though.

I don't have any particular web related goals other than Attempt to keep the same site layout and actually finish pages I have as WIPs. I'm not making huge goals as a lot of them are written down elsewhere and should happen naturally as I tackle other goals. This site will grow with me since its a commonplace. It's really no real goals here other than....well, a digital journal. I guess the goal would be to make it even more of a commonplace than it is archive focused...granted i ever decide on a layout lol.

I hope next year will be kinder to everyone, and even if not, I hope everyone keeps fighting their hardest to make art and be themselves. No matter what happens in the world, do not let it strip you of what makes you who you are and what gives you strength to go forth.